i hab a code.

and i also hab a convention that i'm running in aaaaaagh holy fuck two weeks.

so it's not that i don't love you. it's just that given the new job, the cold, the convention, and everything else, time to update the blog is a little hard to find.

if my head falls off or anything, i'll let you know, though. i promise.

Jim C. Hines - Thoughts on Men and Rape

over on my corner of livejournal, we're having a bit of a goround (again) (and doesn't it just piss me off that this is still necessary) about women as people, instead of women as objects. (feminism, the belief that women are people.)

jim hines gets quite a few things right here.

Jim C. Hines - Thoughts on Men and Rape:

But of course, that's not our problem. So long as none of those girls try to punish us by playing the rape card, we've got nothing to worry about. Besides, I'm no rapist, so what more do you want? Teach the girls not to get drunk or walk alone or lead guys on, and they'll be fine.

I love that logic. I never raped anyone, so it's not my problem, and I don't have to worry about it. But have you ever wondered why such an overwhelming majority of rapists are men? Ever wonder where guys get the idea they're allowed to do that to another human being? I'll give you a hint. Step one in learning to rape? Learn to see your victim as a thing, rather than a person.

But like I said, none of this is our problem as guys. None of us have ever contributed to the idea that women are objects, things to be ogled and grabbed and used. None of us have ever laughed along with the demeaning jokes, or watched one of our buddies work to get a girl drunk in order to get her into bed. None of us have made excuses for a man who grabs a woman's breast without permission. Oh, no. None of us have done a damn thing.

Forgive me if I sound a little bitter. Let's just say that after you sit there in a closed room with one of your best friends who's screaming because she just bumped into her rapist a few minutes ago, it becomes harder to worry about the guys feeling picked on because I was so rude as to suggest maybe this is our problem too.

so! are you going to fourth street fantasy con? i am.

it is, for the record, not invitational, and not sold out.

elizabeth bear is the guest of honor. many other fine people are coming. there will be a chapbook published with pictures of my friend elise's jewelry, with things written by people about the jewelry. there will also be the traditional things at a convention, including food, drink, and good people to hang out with and talk to.

i never went to the original set of fourth streets. i had just resigned myself to the fact that i was not going to invent a time machine in my spare time and go back and make one of them. and then lydy, bless her, decides we should have another one. so here we are. and here i am, registered.

it's going to be a very fun time. you should come.

went to applecon this weekend, and it was fun. i was not certain i'd love it, as while i think that convention music, pie, and card games are all fine things they are not my favoritest.

however, it was good. there was tasty tasty food (olives and cheese and crackers and um, other things, but i like saltiness so that's where i went), and good people to talk to, and more pictures taken of me (this being friends with photographers stuff is okay by me) and staying out too late and chattering animatedly on the way home with my friend rachael who i gave a ride to. also, i totally lost a game of wizard, which i had never played before.

now i just have to go to bed at a reasonable hour so that getting up early to go to my new job in the morning will be easier. note that i did not say easy. oy.

i just realized i am about to have a pants crisis. my size has changed drastically over the last three years or so, and at the same time, evil jeans manufacturers have put spandex in everything. i like spandex. spandex has many fine uses. but not in my jeans.

my current solution to this is to buy used pants off of ebay, but eventually, other people will run out of pants to sell me.

i suspect a conspiracy. darn those pants manufacturers. darn them to heck.

this is probably tmi for some of you, but you're all strong and smart and can deal. (hi mom! hi dad!)

dear katherine kersten: you are a pinhead.

Here's another myth: that young women are as eager to hop in the sack as young men.

based on my own personal experience, which is a sample size only one less than the one ms. kersten draws from, i would say that women are *more* eager. because hello, have i ever been turned down a few times.

Surely, lots of women remember fighting off groping guys in high school and mashers at college frat parties. Sex with the average hormone-driven guy -- who sometimes can't wait to brag about "scoring" -- is supposed to be enticing or empowering to women? Give me a break.

it is neither enticing or empowering. however, i happen to think reasonably well of most men, unlike ms. kersten, and think that while hormones are a strong driver of people in general, it is in fact possible to be reasonable, adult, and caring in one's sexual relationshps, regardless of one's hormonal load or one's set of wiggly bits.

also, if having sex with "the average hormone-driven guy" is supposed to be unappealing, why in the hell would i want to marry him and *then* have sex with him?

ms. kersten, if you don't want to have sex with people you're not married to, that's fine. don't. and i am perfectly fine with providing support for other people who would rather not have sex until they're married.

however, i continue to believe that you do not get to enforce your viewpoint, and that people, especially young people, who do have sex when you'd rather they not, need support and help as well, and i am committed to providing it for them.

you go ahead and have your knitting instead of dating parties, and i'll keep volunteering at planned parenthood.

pimentos for gus has two albums out that i don't own.

when i am employed i will remedy this.

(did i not mention that part? not currently employed. pesky state budget.)